


Where Everything Crumbles and Breaks

by Bisexual_Fangirl_Forever



Series: Roman Isn't Okay Anymore [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Gen, Homophobic Language, Hurt No Comfort, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:00:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23518078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bisexual_Fangirl_Forever/pseuds/Bisexual_Fangirl_Forever
Summary: Roman is nervous for telling his parents, but Mr. Sanders makes him know that he is there, and gives Roman hope.Although....Hope is a funny thing, one second it's there and then the next it's gone.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Sleep | Remy Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Thomas Sanders
Series: Roman Isn't Okay Anymore [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1662115
Comments: 25
Kudos: 76





	Where Everything Crumbles and Breaks

**Author's Note:**

> I just want to say before this: I am so sorry. I'll have you know that this is the angstyest it will get, that its only uphill from here. 
> 
> Trigger warning, this gets D A R K.

Roman hated having classes in the morning. He would much rather have art in the morning, but nope. He was stuck sitting in the middle of math, feeling terrible. He was tired and nervous, for he had stayed up for most of the night scared and filled to the brim with dread for what he was going to do. 

He was going to tell his parents. 

He was going to tell them everything that was going on with him, and hopefully they won't disown him or something over it. 

"Roman? Can you solve the problem on the board?" Mr. Sanders asked. The boy in question stared at the board in confusion, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. He panicked, stuttering and he turned red, his embarrassment leveling up when he heard some of the kids giggling. He curled in on himself when he couldn't figure out what to do instead of answering. 

Roman sighed when Mr.Sanders seemed to deflate and moved to someone else in the class. 

~~**You are such a failure, and even Mr.Sanders can see it. Great job!**~~

The lesson went by quickly, Roman understanding none of it, and before he knew it he had a paper in front of him that could've honestly been in Egyptian. He silently cursed himself for not paying attention. Before the boy could even pick up his pencil, however, his teacher passed by and gestured for him to meet him in the hallway. He paled and audibly gulped. 

~~**You did something wrong, and this is your punishment. Why else would your teacher call you out?** ~~

Roman, now even more nervous, slowly got out of his seat and dragged his feet to follow his teacher. He hated getting talked to in private, even if it was sometimes something good. 

The hallway was empty besides for the teacher and his student, and Roman was glad that nobody else would see him. Mr.Sanders looked at Roman with a worried look and let out a deep sigh. 

~~**You're disappointing him already.** ~~

"Roman," he said. "I've noticed that you've been somewhere else, I guess, during class. Like your body's there, but your mind isn't." 

Roman cringed for how accurate he was. 

"Are you okay?" That part surprised him. Teachers usually never noticed when Roman was ever in the dumps, plus if they ever did, they always assume he was lazy or just stayed up too late the night before. 

"I-I...do you want the honest truth?" Mr.Sanders nodded. "Then no, I'm not okay." His teacher seemed taken aback. Maybe he wasn't sure if Roman was going to answer honestly or not. 

"Is there anything I can do to help? Or is it something at home?" Roman sighed. 

"It's… just something at home. I'm not sure you could help." He would've told him, but… Roman didn't think that he was close enough with his teacher yet. It was nice that he was asking in the first place, but still. At least there were some adults that cared to notice anyway...

Mr. Sanders nodded and gave Roman a small smile. 

"Alright, Ro. But remember, I'm here for you, and I'll always be here if you need help, okay?" Roman nodded. 

The two ventured back into the classroom and Mr. Sanders gave Roman a small math review, and all of the boy's fears washed away for the rest of the day. Roman was happy that there was at least an adult on his side, even if his parents might not... but he hoped that they would be. There his _parents_ for heavens sake. What's the worst that could happen? 

* * *

Roman got home that day confident and happy. He would tell his parents and they would help him! 

As Roman stepped through the door, all his hopes went down the drain. He was met with his parents, but they were fuming over something. His father took him by the shoulder and dragged him into the dining room, where he pushed his son into a chair, Romans backpack getting lost along the way. 

His mother strut to where Roman was sitting and shoved a computer in his hands. His father stood with her and gestured to him to read it. 

As Roman read over the lines, his face paled. It was an email to his mother from Mr. Sanders. He was writing about his concern over Roman. By the end of the email, Roman was scared out of his mind. His father took the computer back and slammed it shut, he then threw it on the table with equal force, causing Roman to cringe from the noise. 

"So," his father started, arms crossed. "Why haven't you been paying attention?" 

"I-I'm trying-" 

"Don't stutter boy!" His mother screamed, and Roman flinched. 

"I'm trying to pay attention…" he said in a meek voice. His parents laughed and suddenly, Roman felt a whole lot like Remus when he's yelled at about his grades. He felt stupid and so... small. 

"Then try harder!" His parents screamed in unison. Roman flinched. 

"God! If you don't pay attention then your grades will slip, like Remus," his mother said Remus's name like it was poison, and it made Roman's blood boil. 

"You have to be the perfect one! You are the kid with the perfect grades, the one who's happy all the time, It's great marketing!" his mother continued.

"Yeah, we don't want another disappointment to the family! It'll ruin the business! It's already bad enough that your brothers are fags-" 

"What did you say about my brothers?" Roman said, quiet, but he still said it. He wasn't going to sit out and listen to him throw his brothers under the bus. He wasn't going to sit by and do nothing... not anymore. 

"Excuse me?" 

"I said," Roman raised his voice, and dared to look at his father. "What did you say about my brothers?" 

"How dare you speak up to your father!" His mother squealed. Roman glanced at the hallway and saw Remus looking at them. Roman couldn't read his expression, but Remus looked at least a little shocked. 

"Your father gives up so much every day to make sure that you get to do what you want! You were going to hurt our business, so the least you can do is-" 

"ENOUGH!" Someone yelled. It took a few minutes for Roman's brain to process who had said it, but he soon realized that it was him. He had said it. His parents looked surprised, but then they were foaming at the mouth. Before they could get a word in, however, Roman jumped from his chair, causing it to fall back behind him with a crash. 

"YOU ACT LIKE YOU'RE THE BEST PARENTS IN THE WORLD, YOU THINK YOU MAKE SACRIFICES, BUT YOU DON'T!" His parents gasped, offended. Good. 

"YOU IGNORE YOUR CHILDREN, AND YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING THAT GOES ON WITH US! YOU DON'T KNOW HOW STRESSED REMY IS, OR HOW YOU'RE MOST LIKELY DAMAGING REMUS, AND YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT HOW I CUT MYSELF!" In the hallway Remus let out a small gasp. Roman could barely comprehend that someone had stepped through the door, he was so mad. 

"YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING YOUR CHILDREN DO, BECAUSE YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS! YOU ACT LIKE YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS IS WORTH MORE THAN YOUR CHILDREN!"

"Roman Prince! You will calm down-" his mother tried to reason. 

"NO I WON'T CALM DOWN! THE ONLY TIME YOU GET INVOLVED WITH ME OR REMUS OR REMY IS WHEN WE DID SOMETHING WRONG! THE FACT THAT I CUT MYSELF AMD HATE MYSELF AND YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW IS SAD!" Roman would've gone on forever, and he really wanted to, but his voice died when his mother raised her hand, targeting his face. 

Roman flinched when he heard a slap, but the pain never came. He slowly opened his eyes and was met with a body. A body? 

"I will not allow you to hit my brother." Remus said, standing in front of Roman. He now had a red mark on his face from where he was struck, but he acted like it wasn't there, and like the pain was nothing. 

"Remus, how could you! Why you little-" 

"If you call my brother anything remotely negative, I will not hesitate to put you in your place." Roman gasped when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Remy was standing beside him, his glasses off so you could see the rage and fire in his eyes, Roman wasn't used to seeing his big brother so mad. 

"Boys, you go and run, I'll handle Mom and Dad," Remy said, never breaking his gaze with his parents. Roman ran and Remus followed as Remy and their parents started to yell again. 

Roman raced to the bathroom. Now that everything he said was coming back to him, he was feeling a cocktail of emotions, and he needed to get them out. There was a small voice in the back of his mind saying that, being in this emotional state is bad, and that he was going to do something that he would most likely regret, but Roman shoved it away. 

He slammed the door behind him and forced open the cabinet door. He fished around for his old friend, but found something different. Something much more deadly. 

~~**You won't have to face them again if you kill yourself, so why don't you go ahead and do it?** ~~

* * *

Remus raced into his room, expecting Roman to be doing the same, but stopped when he saw him head into the bathroom. Remus sighed. He wasn't an idiot, he saw what Roman did to himself. He heard all the times Roman would list off stuff that was wrong with him. He knew what his twin did to his arms and legs. 

He wanted to say something, but he was Remus. The hated twin. Why would Roman listen to him… if his own parents didn't? 

After a good five or six minutes of debate, Remus decided to sit at the stairs to their room. He was far away enough from the fighting that he couldn't make out words, but he heard the basic noise. It was terrible, after he thought about it, that this was the normal for his family. The screaming and yelling was normal. 

Remus sat on his steps for what felt like an hour, even if it was just for a few minutes, waiting for Roman. He had decided to confront his twin about, well, everything. Finally, he couldn't take it. He went up to the bathroom door and knocked. 

When Remus didn't get a reply, he knocked again. 

"Roman? Are you okay?" When he still didn't get a reply, Remus went to the doorknob, worried out of his mind. He was surprised when he saw that the door was unlocked. 

Once he opened the door and had a look inside, he screamed at what he saw.

* * *

Remy was in the middle of screaming at his parents when he heard a different voice. A voice that was way to scared and worried. A voice so terrified, Remy didn't even realize for a second that is was Remus. 

"REMY! REMY COME QUICK! PLEASE! ROMAN NEEDS HELP! PLEASE!" Stopping mid sentence, Remy raced to where he heard Remus scream. He found him on the bathroom floor, cradling an unconscious Roman, who had two empty bottles of sleeping pills next to him. 

"No…" he whispered. He ran forward and time seemed to slow down. He barely remembered crying at Remus to call 911. He barely remembered the twins crying for their brother as paramedics took him to the hospital. He barely remembered his parent's shocked faces. All he could do was cradle his sobbing siblings, and hope for the best, even if the worst was a bigger possibility. 


End file.
